I cannot believe how utterly different a place the world feels today from the one in which I wrote my last blog post. Understandably a lot of people are very scared and worried right now.
When I set out on this marathon journey it was in part a small attempt to make up for the years of my life I lost to my epilepsy. A defiant and stubborn stand that I would not miss out on anything again! So upon hearing the marathon had been postponed, like tens of thousands of others, I was extremely disappointed! Less than a week before I was celebrating my first ever half marathon and excited to hold my fundraiser, full of friends and family, the following weekend.
The COVID-19 outbreak and the unprecedented social distancing and lockdown measures that have resulted are the biggest disruption to daily life most people living within the UK have ever experienced. Concerns loom across every element of our lives, the constant worry of getting ill, of the ones we love getting ill, the financial impact of it all, the impact of being isolated on our friendships and relationships, as well as our mental health and even the fear of not surviving it all. These anxieties and fears are all completely valid.
However there are people for whom this way of life is not an incredible shock to the system, this way of living, these worries are in fact something they are very much used to. Over the last decade of my life I have spent years confined to my own home. Under the extreme lockdown restrictions today I still have more freedom and quality of life than I did only a few years ago.
If I am completely honest it has been hard to step backwards, revisiting the same isolation in the same four walls something I had hoped to have put behind me forever but it is a familiar place for me and my family, for a lot of people this is a terrifying unknown. I just want to say to all of those who are struggling right now that there will be good days and there will be bad days and that is okay, the most important thing is to be kind to others and to be kind to yourself.
There will be a lot of missed events and milestones during this time, whether it be a marathon, birthday, holiday, graduation or wedding, to feel a sense of sadness and unfairness is completely normal, allow yourself to feel that sadness and sense of loss. It is however crucially important to remember to look for what remains and to be grateful for what we do have. Take time to practice self care, whatever that may look like for you, for me it might be reading a book with a cup of tea, doing some yoga or just taking some time to paint my nails.
Last weekend I would have completed my first 20 mile run. With the revised marathon date and the current social distancing regulations I now run just 5k, 3 times a week. I am fortunate to live in a fairly quiet Suburb with lots of open green space, I stay local to my house, run when it is most quiet and only with a member of my household ensuring we stay at least 2m from anyone else. I've also added in some home yoga and strength workouts. I’ve had to adapt but I haven’t given up training and I will not give up.
We are all in this together, there is a enormous and reassuring sense of a community at the moment. The acts of kindness and compassion that others show to you and that you show to others during this time are what will sustain us and I hope that when life, for most of us, returns to normal we will continue that sense of community and also have a renewed empathy and compassion for all of those people who’s isolation will remain.
Whilst we cannot see as much of our loved ones as we would like, call them, text them, remind them that you are thinking of them. From my own experiences I can assure you those small and simple acts will mean the world. Stay safe and take care of yourselves.
If you would like to support my marathon journey and more importantly the life changing work of Epilepsy Research UK please see the link below to donate.
Every donation makes a difference!